Rock the Casbah

Before i begin this post i must apologize to a friend (whom I will call Mr Z, he will know who he is ) because this is about his friend.
On Thursday I had a day off and i'd agreed to go to an Art Gallery with Mr Z .I'd wanted to see a particular exhibition and done some online research about the artist and paintings and was eager to view them since the gallery will soon be closing .Mr Z  had said he was interested and we agreed to go together.I dressed all in black for some reason.Black pants,sweater,long black cardigan coat and black stiletto boots.
I met Mr Z at the door and he had a friend with him.Who for purpose of the story i will call Mr Loves Himself ( LH ).  Mr LH was in his 30's had short blonde spiked hair.Very good looking but quite the poser.Dressed in a linen suit and designer sunglasses. He looked more suitably dressed for a scene from  Miami Vice then for the brutal February weather.
We go inside and peruse the artwork.Then about 15 mins in Mr Z  gets a call and has to return to his office.Leaving me in the company of  Mr LH. Mr LH had spent most of the time inside looking for pretty ladies and then posing himself on the display cabinets thrusting out his chest before trying varies chat up lines.To be fair he was getting some success a few Hi's and smiles. ( Mainly from the toddlers with their moms)
Then he decides to walk around with me giving me his vast knowledge of the artist and paintings.Which amounted to nothing but a load of bullshit.Remember i like to research things before hand.I never said anything though just laughed quietly to myself.
After about 90 mins id seen what i wanted and started to leave,Mr LH walked outside with me.Join me for lunch he says i'm starving.No thanks i say i've already eaten.
Not taking no for answer he then gets onto his knees ,hands praying and starts to beg.I was a little annoyed at his childish behaviour but just to make him get up and stop people from staring i agreed to lunch.
We got to the restaurant and he ordered a meal and a bottle of wine.I just got an appetizer and a cup of coffee since i really didn't want anything.I refused the offer of wine.I didn't want to do anything stupid.  I have been known to have impaired judgement after consuming wine.
He completely bored me to tears with his chat about how much money he has,what things he has ,where he goes on holiday.What a boring cow his wife was.I'm sat there thinking i don't care a crap about any of this stuff don't you have anything interesting to talk about like hobbies, your family, interesting things in your line of work ( that does not includre Lentils, another story for another time ) ,history, or music.
Then finally he starts talking about punk music in the 70's.Great i think something I'm interested in.But,no it turns out his vast repertoire of punk was 2 records he'd bought by the clash and sex pistols and he knew nothing else.

So,i'm sat there and the more wine he drank the more of a loud mouthed cocky jerk he became.I was so glad when he finished his meal so i could make excuses to leave.I'm polite i know and i wouldn't dream of being rude during the meal.Even though he was.
We walk outside and i say goodbye nice to meet you etc.Then he pops up my wife doesn't travel with me why don't you come back to my hotel room i could sure show you a good time Anna you wouldn't regret it.
I felt like i was put on the spot a little and made an excuse that i had to get home and that maybe we should get together another time(which translates to no f..kin chance buddy)
He replies i can't believe what amazing chemistry we have i can feel the sex sizzle between us
I'm stood there nodding thinking i don't think science was your subject at school
So,i went home alone and the only person i had sex with that day was myself
I do have my standards.